All relationships can turn into difficult ones, whether they are romantic relationships or with family or friends. On many occasions, people we get angry or are we the one who screwed up. But there are times when we go beyond the limits of others. It is in these moments if we ask ourselves if it is really worth giving these people a second chance.
Should we give second chances?
When someone makes a serious mistake, sometimes it is not as easy as ‘forgive and forget‘. The limit is precisely in respect for ourselves both for the person who has caused us this damage and for our own ego.
Sometimes forgiving and giving second chances can have consequences on our self-esteem and personal safety. That is why it is vital to think if we really should give an opportunity and especially if that person deserves it.
There are some occasions, how are second chances in love due to infidelity in which many people are more than clear that they should not be granted. But the reality is that everything will depend on our feelings and the feelings we have in respect. Sometimes, the context and our emotions will give us the answer that we must take firmly. In this way, each person has to decide for himself what his threshold is to decide whether to give an opportunity for love both in a couple and in any family or friendship relationship.
Why should we give second chances?
If you are in a situation in which you are doubting whether to give second chances in your relationship or in any relationship, here we will explain some psychological reasons why you should rethink giving that option to a person.
1. We can change
People have the ability to change. In fact, according to various investigations, the personality of an individual change more between the ages of twenty and forty. This is because it is during adulthood when people get used to exploring our needs more through introspection. Therefore, those people who propose it can change their habits and their attitude through effort and perseverance. That is why if you see that the other person is looking for a second chance and you see that they are making an effort to get it, perhaps that is a sign that you can rethink giving yourself a little more confidence.
2. It is a relationship beyond love
There are bonds that through the years go beyond love. In this way, second chances in the couple can occur when the relationship is confident, loyal and a lot of respect. If you think that only love is all that holds you together, it is not worth giving your partner a second chance. On the other hand, if your relationship goes much further, perhaps you should take this bump in your life.
3. The problem is not that serious
You may have gotten angry because of more of a problem with your insecurities or lack of personal trust for the person next to you. Sometimes we do not realize that we pay for our mistakes or internal problems with others, causing others to suffer the consequences of our low self-esteem or bad psychological habits. Therefore, you should take some time to think about it and to avoid not regretting leaving your partner or the bond with your friendship or family.
4. When actions speak louder than words
Sometimes people can make mistakes. In cases where you do not see as your own the attitude of the other towards you or the mistake they have made, you may have to consider or start over after an infidelity or opt for second chances. These are the times when people take actions that show you over and over again that there really is regret.
5. There is a commitment to solve it
Commitment and trust is the basis for opting to give a second chance. In many cases, committed people looking for a second chance will show you through your actions, demonstrating in many moments that they are willing to change their actions or correct the damage they have caused in you.
6. When they understand the damage
You only have to opt for second chances when people understand why they have caused you so much damage. The people who are not worth it It will try to justify all the damage they have done to you even if they do not have it. When this person does not fight for the second chances that you have given him and does not understand the repercussions of his actions, then he has not really learned his lesson and therefore will not change.
7. They really feel it
A genuine apology is one of the reasons why you should consider giving people second chances. In order to move forward in any relationship, the key is knowing how to apologize and learn to accept them. Only when these come from a real apology do we need to advocate for second chances.
Can forgive it is very difficult for people on an emotional level. On many occasions, despite advocating for a second chance, some people may suffer within the relationship. Therefore, it is sometimes good contact with a professional psychologist to try to clarify if we really should give our partner or bond a chance.